Monday, September 19, 2011

There's a fugitive on the loose!

We have a pyromaniac schizophrenic kleptomaniac living in the Leverett house. 

Below is the police report filed against the little stinky fingered fugitive ...

Case Number: L-29975
Incident Date: 18 August, 2011
Incident Time: 1:30 PM
Incident Location: The Leverett House/The Boy's Toybox
Incident Victim: Ma
Reporting Party: Ma

Victim took advantage of her children being at their grandparent’s house for the night and decided to clean out her son’s toy box.  While cleaning out the toy box, the victim (“Ma”) located several items that mysteriously vanished over the past several months.  The recovered contents in question are:
1.       Whisk
2.       Pencil
3.       Coasters
4.       Duct Tape
5.       Back Massager
6.       Calculator

Image of recovered items

Crime scene
Based on a thorough review of the location and condition of the recovered items, a primary suspect was swiftly identified.  

The suspect in question goes by the following aliases:
-The Boy
-The Turkey Leg
-Big Bubba
-The Carpet Stainer
-The P.I.T.A.

Below is an archived image of the suspect in question.

Based on the vivid description by Ma, the suspect doesn’t likes to wear only a dinosaur back pack.

Please approach with caution as the suspect is considered moody and stinky!  Please do not approach without arming yourself appropriately with dinosaurs, chocolate milk, baby wipes, a binkie and a diaper.

1 comment:

Lady Blachly said...

Ha! Thats a good find there,, uh Officer. Makes me want to go on a good toy box purge myself.